Illume – Growing Kids God's Way (May 12)

Illume is our once a month women’s brunch ministry. This month’s teaching is by Amy Manning and is titled “Growing Kids God’s Way”.

There are notes available on the teaching here:

Growing Kids God’s Way-Amy Manning 5-12-12
Styles or Types of Parenting
-Permissive
-Overprotective
– Bribing (bartering with your children in hopes that you will gain obedience-what happens when rewards no longer work?)
-Threatening/Repeating
-Silent/Delayed
-Absent/Substitute
-Unapproachable/Discouraging
-Manipulating
-Child centered
-Mother centered
– God centered
Parenting is not suppose to be an overwhelming burden, but a rewarding privilege
Psalm 127:3
Families have a Kingdom purpose
Obedience and disobedience are moral acts not individual preferences
Train, encourage, and teach at God’s level of standards
Principle’s of Obedience
Eph. 6:1  & Col. 3:20
*If we can’t teach our children to be obedient to us how will they learn to obey God?
Ex. 20:12 ( The way children demonstrate honor is through obedience)
*Delayed obedience is disobedience
Principles we need to avoid, negative parenting styles:
Bartering, Negotiating & Conflict undermines the process towards biblical obedience
Principles we need to establish character in our children:
1. When speaking to a child in a way that requires an answer or action, they need to immediately respond (yes, mom) children will rise to the level that is expected in your home. If you expect little you will get little results
2. Don’t ever give a command unless you intend for it to be obeyed, you must enforce the rules. When you don’t follow through you teach them to disregard instruction
Our instructions need to be directive or restrictive
Give 5 minute warnings, they prepare emotionally to comply (set a timer if it helps)
*Let kids know there is always a “door of escape”, walk away and get a parent, you have an out
3. When a child continually disobeys they are in sin, when you continually allow disobedience, you are in sin
The title “Mr. & Mrs.” commands respect and shows a level of authority
-We need to be clear in our instruction and consistent
-Require eye contact when giving instruction, eye contact is a focusing skill that helps a child process the instruction
Verbal response=healthy moral development (yes mom, yes dad) form of respect
Turn “don’t run” into “please walk” -disciplining w/ encouragement
Teach our kids at the level that is God’s standards, and God has high standards
1 Sam. 15:22-23, God requires obedience from His children above all else
The primary focus of Christian parenting should be defining God to our children. This is best accomplished by introducing and guiding our children in and by God’s character, which we are called to emulate.
Resources:
www.growingkids.org
www.gfi.org
Potty training, baby’s, teens, blended families, baby wise, etc.

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